Sunday, July 31, 2011


When I started doing blogs about three years ago they contained bits of family stuff that I thought might be entertaining or bring a smile to one's day, and they did, or at least, that's what I was told. 

Actually  the first blog was in 2007 and has continued sporatically over the years. Some of my (fans) readers have told me that the blogs are not funny anymore, they're lacking the original RONNIEISMS intent. 

They said that the commercialism of the last few blogs has turned them off. I apologize for creating those reactions but there aren't many funny things that go on at an auto dealership, however, yesterday was a special day.

One of our clients buying a vehicle was attempting to get as much for his trade that he could, pretty normal, OK? He didn't have the car with him but he left to go get it and drop  it off. The deal was made sight unseen after the client described his older vehicle as a car that had a rebuilt engine in it that made it run like new and had recently had a new paint job. It was a manual transmission but there was no trouble shifting.

The client returns in his vehicle putt putting into the lot. You could hear the grinding as the gears were having a slight problem going into the next speed. But the best was the new paint job, a nice bright red applied with a 6"paint brush, yes you're reading this correctly, painted with a brush. One of his front fenders had been pounded by a ball peen hammer in an attempt to correct a minor accident. None of these incidents came up on the Carfax when we checked. His air conditioning consisted of having the windows open since one of the handles was inoperable.

We went back to the client and told him the car was not exactly what he had described and made a different offer knowing all too well that he would cancel the deal. But, he quickly accepted with an "I'll take it" knowing full well that he was still getting more than his scrap heap was worth. I hope the junk yard doesn't damage this classic too much more.

I guess beauty is really in the eyes of the beholder.

In my attempts to recognize accents and respond with a "hello or good morning" in their original language I usually do pretty well. Since my 5 year stint in Hawaii I can recognize and respond in about 15 languages. My limited ability does not go beyond the familiarities such as hello, good morning, goodbye and thank you.

The other day I approached a couple in the lot that looked to be hispanic (not to be racial profiling) and said "ola, buenas dias. hello, good day. They looked back at me with quizzed looks and answered in broken English, "we're not Mexicans". Naturally, I apologized for my error and carried on speaking very slowly. They were from Nepal and fortunate for them I only knew a few words in Mandarin, that I didn't try.

Many of our clients are immigrants attending the surrounding universities, mostly on scholarships. They come from Eastern Europe, Asia, South America, Mexico and the majority from India and Pakistan. I'm giving up on learning the new languages because my internal RAM is full and floppy discs are long gone. Maybe I can stick a thumbdrive in one of my ears or, never mind, bad idea.

I will stick to my script and say "Welcome to Superior Toyota" and go from there.

During the last 3 or so weeks I've developed heel pain caused by plantar fasciitis so I'm walking rather gingerly with a slight limp. With the temperature on the lot in three figures I've experienced both extremes, high heat and the agony of da feet.